Friday, May 9, 2008
still good
You know, I'm thinking that the wander about is a good thought to continue with. Out in the open country. Let me tell ya: this area I live in is just crawling with humanity and to make it even worse is this whole election year cycle (ain't just a year any more).The politicians and the blathering lies they spew out, grotesque (hmm... is 'blathering' a word? well, if not I think it still fits in how it was used). Yeah, the only change I really need is one of scenery. And this thing about 'change' the politicos yak on about, is that all we will have left in our pockets after being taxationed-without-representation ed? I wonder... could become a wanderer by force. Oh well, go to happy place, go to happy place. Ah, better now! Life is good you know.
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Oh, yes... we are in the same "place" aren't we? I do feel as you do, that strong innate sense that I want to go. I want to get away from "civilization" and politics, consumerism, rat race stuff. Yet, I do know that I will inevitably want some connection with civilization, just not much maybe?
More than anything, it is a change of scenery that seems desirable. I feel a strong desire to change my environs and thus, stimulate my creative self. It is that gypsy in me. She's a confused gypsy though... fantasizing about living in various places and yet, also fantasizing about a lovely stability. I do hope we can have it all. Perhaps there is a time to be a gypsy and then a time to be stable. I think now is my time to be a gypsy. :)
I think the only "thing" that can force a person to wander is themselves. I think that those of us who have such a strong wandering spirit, can only truly be happy when we yield to it. And it isn't so much that we are forcing ourselves to wander against our will. Rather, it seems that heeding to that wandering self is the only real freedom we can know. So, in heeding to it, we stop fighting against the life we are currently unhappy with.
All that mumbo jumbo is really my way of saying (and mostly to cowardly self) that the angst we feel with regard to wanting to wander isn't a result of wandering. The wandering itself is what is true, pure, angst-free. It is because we are not yielding to it that we feel angst with it. Although it seems so daunting to embrace that wanderlust completely, what really stops us? The thought of "losing" all that we have here and now? It seems ridiculous when suspending my own fear... because really, what could be easier than returning to this lifestyle?
If somehow the wandering proves unsatisfying (and I highly doubt it will), we can easily say "okay, I'm done. I'm ready to go back to a life in society, with a regular job and such." That opportunity will always be here. But the ability to wander, explore, experience something different... is harder to come by, I believe.
Phew... what a rant, eh?! :) Truly though, I need to take a large dose of my own prescription here! The writer inside me is imprisoned by stagnation.
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